On to a new life?

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2017. The year I turned 48. A year of revelations and epiphanies.

I am allowing myself an online detox and reset week. To see where I am at, and what I need to do as next steps in my life. To review things that have passed. The lessons and gifts of the year.

I have never been good at expressing my feelings in real life. I don’t like drama, and I never really know how to express myself openly. Always afraid of judgments and opinions.

Writing in that sense is easier for me. It always has been.

So, when I realised that my married life was over, and had been for a while, I first wrote a blog. About losing the love of my life. Because this was basically a confession to myself, my husband and my marriage, I never actually published it. It was too personal.

But I did share the blog with my husband and that set things in motion. That was the moment we decided to end our 21-year path together and go our own way.

Easier said than done when your lives have been so tuned in to each other for so long. Much like deer’s antlers, they have become entangled in many ways.

But also, how everything started to get clear to me after this decision.

You see, we are not fighting, we are not narcissists, we didn’t cheat on each other, we don’t abuse each other. We just realised we wanted something different in life. From life.

My need for change, my restless soul, my passion for nature, the planet, the animals. These are not his needs.

Especially the past decade I have been on the road to finding myself again. Because I was lost. Very lost. After puberty, the loss of hope and dreams, the loss of family and ending my then long-term relationship had thrown me into a dark hole, where I questioned my very existence.

Right in that moment, I met him. And he came into my life at the right time. I think we both did for each other. He needed to break free from his parents and find his own strength and self-worth, and I needed someone who would take care of me.

And he did. The emotional state I was in when we met brought out the best in him. And I could open my heart to love again.

How it all evolved from that moment was probably all meant to be, but the last few years we tried to hang on to that feeling. That we had back then. All the beautiful moments we shared, the grief we shared around loss and pain. We were desperately trying to constantly adjust to each other. He did things he really didn’t want to deep down, but he did it so I would not be disappointed in him. I was holding back on my even bigger dreams as this was not what he wanted out of life. We compromised the hell out of our relationship.

The moment we decided to sell the house and move to nature, deep down I knew he was doing it to keep me happy. And I knew that in the end, he would start to resent me for this. And I compromised again by saying that we would at least stay in this country. And I understood why he wanted to stay here. I guess I knew him better than I thought.

So, finally, I asked him, what do YOU want? Really want? And then it all came out. For the both of us. And we cried because we both realised that the feeling that was once there was really gone. We had lost the love of our lives, just not through death.

But you see, loving someone also means being able to let them go.

So, we decided on a divorce. We would still sell the house, and after getting the divorce and go our separate ways.

And then it happened. Me realising how I had been getting dependant on him and his income so deeply.

Basically, I had nothing. Or not much. No steady income, no savings, no drivers’ license or car. His always being there for me had made me “lazy”. Not an independent, strong woman at all.

So, what to do next? Looking around for the “normal” options made me very unhappy. But, I probably wouldn’t have a choice, at least for now.

Still, everything in me is saying, go for your dreams now. Don’t fall for the same settle for less trap, as you have done for so many years. Go chase those dreams. Live in/with nature, in time move to another part of the planet. See something of the world. See the animals you get messages from in real life. Connect with other people and cultures. Connect with like-minded souls. Not just online, but in real life. Because I miss that. Talking about life and the world in a deep, philosophical way. Only to jump up next and just dance to life.

But oh, that feeling of responsibility… Towards my pets, towards my mother and sister. Towards him. Even towards some friends. It is tearing me apart inside. That responsibility is what got me into the dark hole many years ago. Feeling trapped, no way out.

I am different, I always have been, I see things differently than most. I even think different. I don’t get attached easily, not to people, houses, and places. But there are exceptions. My pets for instance. Or my sister, whom I love dearly and don’t want her to take care of all the things around my mom on her own.

So, maybe I will have to settle for less for a while…. Or look for a compromise. And every time I think of that my stomach makes this weird spasm. Is it fear that is holding me back? Using my responsibility as “excuse”?

And having trust and faith in my future is hard for me at the moment. My life hasn’t been easy so far, not overly difficult, but not easy either. And a lot of that had to do with mindset, limiting beliefs and family patterns.

But still, trust and faith are just what I need to have. And every card pulled, every reading I get, they all are very positive. So, trust. Take action, but only inspired. Not push, not pull. Invite in and see the possibilities that come on my path.

And, in the end, it has to be my choice. Do I go for my dreams? Or do I settle for less?

What I do know is that I really feel a deep need to be on my own for a while. I have never been one for a “standard” relationship, I value my freedom, and hanging on just for the sake of outer appearance, or for the kids has never been on my agenda. Luckily there are no kids involved.

What I do know is that I have to stay close to myself. When you announce you are getting divorced, so many people jump on and share their thoughts and ideas with you. And this comes from a good place, I am sure of it. But especially in the beginning, all I wanted was a shoulder to cry on. And I wasn’t even able to be clear on that. So, this is also forcing me to look at my boundaries and my communication skills. And yes, when you mention divorce, of course, everyone who has had any experience with this will project their own feelings and experiences on this. And some people were disappointed in me, even angry with me. And that surprised me even more. The people close to me had seen it coming, others probably never really listened, or I didn’t feel safe enough with them to share my true feelings.

And this had me fall back into an old pattern, of thinking my experiences and feelings are less than others. As I said, no narcissist, cheating, fighting or abuse involved. So, I backed down. Decided to keep my feelings inside again, as other people’s stories were so much more intense than mine. Or they had their own difficult times going on, so I didn’t want to bother them with my “tiny” problems and issues. I pulled back and tried to do it all by myself. Still am by the way. And in the end, I AM the only one who can deal with this, as they are my feelings.

You see, what happened during our relationship is something we both let happen because we both don’t like conflicts. We never were able to really communicate openly. And the last few years I have stopped with expectations towards him more and more because these were my own projections. It did lead to realising that without the expectations there wasn’t much left. And I no longer wanted him to change, to be something he wasn’t. It wasn’t fair to him, to myself or our marriage.

Sometimes love isn’t enough. It just isn’t. So, the act of freeing each other is actually our final act of love for each other.

Because he is just a good guy, I wish him nothing but good. I hope he finds his path in life, and someone to share the things with him that I couldn’t. To no longer have to worry about if I might get mad at him, or expect things from him he can’t give.

What my next steps will be? I honestly at this point don’t know. I don’t. There is a mixed feeling of excitement, hope, joy, possibilities, fear, anger, disappointment, failure. They are all visiting me. Sometimes all at once.

Maybe I will move abroad, maybe I will lead a nomadic life for a while, maybe I will check out living in an eco-community, or set one up myself. Maybe I do need to get a job, but even in this, stay open to alternative possibilities.

If there is one important thing I can do now it is walking my talk. Live a life in a different way. “Off the grid”, be a part of the change. Instead of just thinking about it, shouting about it, writing about it.

Part of me wants to just get offline altogether, and start working the land. With my hands, as we were meant to be. I often feel that we have too much time on our hands, too much time to think and worry.

I will let it all in. I will let the feelings be there. I will not deny or hide them. Maybe I still won’t reach out for help. I don’t know. That part of trusting life (humans) still needs a lot of healing.

I need to repair my relationship with money and receiving. I would love to just give and share everything for free, but even though this does happen in my visions of a new world, that world is not here yet. I still have to be a part of that system for now.

And it is all ok. Everything is going to be ok. I just have to believe that.

On to my new life. With more joy and connection. Where I can walk my talk. And write my books. And keep on loving the planet and the animals.

Much love
Diana

 

Realisations and Epiphanies

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Realisations and Epiphanies was the card I drew for myself as theme for 2017. And I can’t believe the last month of 2017 has already begun.

Participating in a colouring course to get more insights into the lessons of this past intense year, I realised it was very much a year of that. Realisations and epiphanies. A year of letting go, on every level.

At the beginning of the year, I felt a bit lost, hollow, empty. Goal-less. I had lost my sense of self, of what I came here to do, of purpose. I was torn between all kinds of stuff, and looking back, I don’t think I have been very happy for quite some time. Not all the time, but still. Overall not really happy.

Not that I didn’t enjoy the simple things in life, but I had signs of burnout and depression running through my life.

You see, ever since I was little, I wanted to do something that had meaning, an impact. I never strived for fame and fortune, I didn’t like making a career, and I disliked people pushing me towards things I didn’t want. Somewhere during this past year, I said to someone, just because your good at something, doesn’t mean you should be doing it.

With that, if it doesn’t bring me joy, or that idea of having an impact, why bother doing it. With my many talents and responsible attitude, if I set my mind and focus to it, I can be good at many things. But do I want to do it? I realised what success meant to me. Not in numbers, material wealth, in fame, but by impact. How happy did I feel when someone told me how I inspired them through a blog or a post. How I had forgotten about all the testimonials on my work with pets. What did that say about me?

This year was also the year where I started to write my book. My first real book. Not a blog, an actual book. And along the year it changed form and shape, but the basic layout remained my life story so far, infused with animal messages.

With writing this book, I also went through my old journals and diaries and dove into my memories. And my biggest realisation on this, besides that memories are strange things, was that I lost myself along the way. I have spent most of my life taking care of other peoples (and animals) needs and had been using spirituality to escape my deepest feelings and emotions. Who was I? What do I really want out of life? What is success to me?

I talked to people, (life) coaches, friends, family, colleagues. I journaled. I took a deep dive into my own waters. Deeper than ever before. Where was the joy? Where was the self-love and respect? I did self-love letter challenges and started integrating a gratitude practice into my life. I started meditating again, in a different way, and do yoga on my terms.

I cried rivers of unshed tears. I felt anger. I felt frustration. I felt deep sadness. I felt joy and love again. Love for myself. And lots of disappointment, feelings of failure. And above all, I knew I was the only one that could turn this around. Make the changes.

My passion has always been with the animals and nature. Ever since I was very young. My deep bond with them. With the planet. How from a very young age on I had been concerned about our impact on the planet. How I over the years had tried to do the best I could. At that time. To my abilities. And always feeling it wasn’t enough.

This year was the year where I realised the unimportance of material possessions. The illusion of the bigger, better, more principle. How doing business the way it is done, even when it’s so-called heart-centred, is still money and ego-driven. And that is not the way I want to. How at one point looked at all business people as predators, not giving about me or my needs, but only about themselves, their resume and their money.

This year has been a year of letting go big time. Literally. Of material stuff. Of my beliefs. Of the illusions I had about life and business. Of the how it should bees. And how we are stuck in this system we created for ourselves. This reconnected me with my little rebel self. The teenager who didn’t like the system as it is, the rules, the false freedom.

This year I also realised that love is the only truth, and that also made me sad, looking at the current state of humanity and the world, the climate, the planet, the animals.

I had a hard time looking at the declining physical and mental health of my mother. I felt compassion for her, as a human. And it made me sad that things between us had never been very loving. Writing my book made me realise that ever since my brothers first suicide attempt, she stopped being a mom, and me and my siblings had to take care of ourselves. And eventually of her. So many decisions made with the responsibility for her in the back of my mind. So many dreams lost.

I had periods of deep faith and trust, feeling guided and protected. I had periods where my boundaries and safety were put to the test.

It made me look at my relationships, with people. How I never really dared to connect on a deeper level, afraid of getting hurt. How I really didn’t trust people that much. How I always, for the sake of peace and harmony, never spoke up. How I above all was acting nice instead of being kind. Including to myself.

In the fall, my most important relationship finally came crashing down. The sale of the house caused my husband and I to come the conclusion that we no longer were walking the same path. We hadn’t been for a while, but it’s hard letting something go that has been bringing some form of safety and comfort for so long.

And it felt like a relief to have said it out loud. I cried. So many tears. Knowing my life was about to change big time because of this. Also tears of joy for finally choosing for myself. And deep grief, because I did lose the love of my life, even if it went gradually. And fear that I would end up the same way as the last time I ended a relationship.

The realisation that sometimes loving someone isn’t enough. Especially when values and ideas are miles apart. And that true love also means setting them free.

And it felt like a failure. I was so mad at myself that I couldn’t make it work. That I just couldn’t be happy with this overall great guy. How I could not overcome the differences.

And the next steps weren’t easy, aren’t easy. My mother who was angry with me, because I was causing this all. Looking at my possibilities in this country for living on my own didn’t make me very happy either.

I felt even more like a failure. I had become what I always dreaded. Dependant on my partner. Especially financially. I failed at building a thriving business. I sucked at being a businesswoman. And my husband confirmed this. And I do. If I look at the conventional way of doing business.

However, it also is giving me new ideas and inspiration. And opening to other possibilities. Maybe I could travel, live a more nomadic life. Part of losing my dreams had been to see more of the world. To travel. Maybe in time, I could move to the UK, my beloved land. Maybe I could live in an ecovillage or a tiny home. Do what I always wanted. Live minimalistic, and more in harmony with nature and Mother Earth.

I am not clear on that at this point. I still need to let go of even more on this. Living a detached life. Not a life where I don’t care, that is something else. Because I care deeply. Maybe I still care too much.

And I am grieving. Over all the letting go. And there is lightness. Every now and then I catch myself laughing again, randomly. Or singing. Even doing a little dance, out of nowhere. Being silly with the pets.

I am grieving over the things I am prepared to let go if necessary, friends, family, beloved pets. My business. Still, if that needs to happen to finally fully claim my lane, then I will do that. If it takes steps I need to take that are scary, I will take them.

Kaypacha Lescher from New Paradigm Astrology called 2017 the year of the endings of illusions. And that happened for me. Big time. Nothing is certain. That is the only certainty we have.

I also know that my path lies with being the advocate for nature and the animals, in a peaceful and inspiring way. Not as an activist or fighter. More as a cosmic warrior.

My book will be finished in 2018. It is time to close those chapters of my life and move on like a wiser person. To fully give in to my natural given talents and gifts, my inner wisdom and not just the learned wisdom from the mind.

I have had so many wonderful connections and conversations over the past year, that helped me move on. I have realised that the answers truly lie within. That someone might guide me for a while, but they cannot solve anything for me. Not in any area. In the end, I can only do that myself. It helps to share, it helps to talk to people of the same kind of quest, or like-minded people. For me, the guidance from mother nature and the animals helps me get clarity. Nature is pure, it has no hidden agenda. It doesn’t want to sell me a mastermind or program I can’t afford. It doesn’t brainwash me into thinking something is wrong with me. Nature fully accepts me as I am. It is ME that needs to learn to BE again.

On my wish, or desires list, I wrote at one point: thank you, thank you, thank you for a simplified and decluttered life. And I am getting what I asked for. And I am totally okay with that.

Somewhere in 2016, I wrote that I felt naked, totally stripped down. I now realise that it was just the beginning, and I am still not totally stripped down. More layers are to come. And I am ready for that.

I love this journey, I truly do. It’s not always easy, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t need to do anything fearless, like jumping off a bridge or walking over hot coals or broken glass. I don’t need to do ayahuasca ceremonies to feel alive. This is enough for me.

I am working towards the point where I can say when someone asks me who I am and what I do: I am me. And that is enough. That is all I need to be.

Diana

The animals are ready to guide you!

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These last weeks I have been sharing more and more about the animals wanting to guide us. Every day I asked an animal to give an idea of what they could be helping you with.

I shared these posts on my Facebook page, and even more in my free group. I also did some live streams from my page, and also on the Project Positive Change Facebook page.

I loved the animals showing up, and giving their own special messages and indications what they would want to help you with.

This is my way, by being a messenger for the animals and nature. I am not a coach or a therapist. I never wanted to be. Working one on one with people in a direct way was never my dream. My passion truly lies in nature and the animals, and through them, I love to inspire you to get more clarity on things that are going on in your life. And how so often you know the answers yourself, you just need to learn to listen again. As I have over the years.

So, a gentle reminder that tomorrow the first live call will take place on finding your year animal for 2018, there is still time to join. Other dates are December 14th and 28th. And if you can’t make it to any of the live calls, you can always get the pre-recorded version, that will be available as of December 1st.

It’s just € 35,00 for the live calls and € 25,00 for the recorded version. In both cases, you can join a closed group on Facebook to talk about your experiences and to ask questions. And maybe it is something you would love to gift to someone! That is also an option, just let me know when you purchase that it is a gift for someone else, and I will let them know 🙂

The other thing I wanted to remind you of is the start of the new round in my Down to Earth Spirituality membership group. We had a great journey with Dolphin last month, and now it is up to Reindeer/Caribou to take over the helm.

And well, Reindeer can pull a sleigh, so…. 😉 Just saying 🙂 Reindeer is the perfect animal to guide us through the darkest month of the year (up North that is), as they specialize in handling those circumstances and still be happy!

I am very much looking forward to seeing what animals show up for you for 2018, and feel blessed Reindeer wanted to join me in December. Come join in on the fun and wisdom they have to share!

Much love,

Diana and the animals

Finding your Year Animal for 2018 and more!

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Hello dear soul,

I am still in working on things in my personal life, but I feel I also need to move forward with what I love getting out there.

My writing, my role as messenger, my role as guide to reconnecting people to (their true) nature.

I have been thinking and feeling a lot lately, about what it is that brings me the most joy. And how to bring that joy into my work.

It is very simple really. What brings me joy is animals, nature, the planet, connections and pure love. To live a life with heart. To live a simple and humble life.

And no matter how much I would love a world without money, for now, that is not reality, and even though I want to live a simplified and humble life, I still need some money.

And I know that what I offer is worth it. This is where my talent lies. To hold space for you, for the animals, for the world.

All I want is a better world, not just for us humans, but for all of life. To let you experience what I experience in and with nature. To find all you need within, with some guidance from nature, the animals and a little from me.

What I am offering right now and in the near future are the following things:

First: It is back! Last year I did a special on finding your year animal for 2017, and that was much appreciated, so I am doing it again this year! For just € 35,00 during a live call or € 25,00 for the recorded meditation journey. Find out more about it on this page.

Second: bringing back the animal communication work, as I still got regular requests in. But, I am doing something different this time, they will be more in the line of the speed readings I do, and it will be on a donation basis. Intrigued? Read more on this page.

Third: I will be doing a regular free challenge in my group on Facebook on learning to read the signs and signals on your path. Everything is about waking up and re-activating your senses. They are all around us, we often are just too busy with doing all kinds of stuff. So, basically, what the challenge is, is to just be for a while every day. December 1st will be the first round, and as said, will do this in my free group.

Fourth: I love my Down to Earth spirituality membership group, I really do. And I would love for it to grow some more, as the messages from the animals and nature spirits are getting more clear and intense. This month with Dolphin is pretty cool, with playing games with our intuition and more! December will have Reindeer visiting. I know lots of people struggle during the holidays and dark winter months. Reindeer is especially adapted to surviving these times, and still be happy. Want to learn their secrets? You can then tap into them 🙂 Find out more about this group on this page.

Fifth: The Healing circle with Karin Monster is also still going strong, and also in there would love some more members. We are doing some amazing deep work in there, and we support each other. It is not just Karin and me, we are really doing it all together. It’s a beautiful and loving group. You can read more on this page.

Sixth: Just two months left for the Speedreadings for charity, and then it’s done. The next one is on November 28th and the last one for December 19th. For November only six more spots available, and for December ten. Claim your spot on this page.

Seventh: I decided to get going with the Nature Communicator Course. As it is a pilot, I am just going ahead with it. It is all a learning process, it doesn’t have to be perfect from the start. And those who join me in the pilot get to help me refine it. I will share more on this soon, but you can already take a look at this page, and maybe reserve your place!

The coming months I will start recording my meditation journeys, and I am working on a year course, Find Your True Nature, where we will work with the Seasons and the magic of the Medicine Wheel. I am looking at how to get the real-life part of that course into place, but it will be all about reconnecting with your true nature through nature.

That’s all for now.

Oh, and yes, still working on my book, part two is nearly finished and we are getting a pretty clear picture of how the book will turn out when it is done. Exciting, just a little more patience. Just as I am living life at a slower pace in other areas, I don’t need to finish my book in a month. I’d rather have a book that really shows what I am about than a book that is just there for the sake of producing a book. I am not about the numbers, I am about depth and quality.

In the meantime, you can always read my latest blogs on my website.

Now I am really done, thank you for reading through to the end, and I hope to connect to you soon, in one way or another.

Much love,
Diana

Faith in humanity?

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The past few years I have been working a lot on myself. My inner growth. Getting to know the real me and what I came here to do. Or be.

Part of that process was loving myself again, accepting myself in every form and accepting where I am on my path.

Part of that process was being able to love other humans again the same way.

Part of that process was restoring my faith in humanity and hope for the future.

I have been looking and searching for my life purpose. I know it is all about Nature. The animals, the plants, the trees, everything. Mother Earth herself. Part of this was accepting the fact that we are a part of that beautiful nature. That I am a part of that. We are not a separate species, we are all connected and everything that happens to nature also happens to us. And the other way around. It’s a constant cycle.

This week I had some talks, with people, on how to be of service. We agreed that the only way I can truly be of service is to first take care of myself. And that is true, I cannot give from an empty well. And this is something people are understanding, take care of yourself first. But sometimes not in a healthy way, at least not in harmony with that which we are a part of. For me taking care of myself involves the not harming others in the process of that.

I have been feeling anger, resentment, pain, sadness, grief. I have been looking at how I can be a part of the change that needs to happen, if we are to survive as species, as planet, as system.

I realise that I can only do that by helping people understand that most important part of all: we are all connected. It is not just about us, not just about humans, the world doesn’t revolve around us. Us is them. Us is nature. Us is the planet.

In taking care of ourselves some people think that is in a material way. Especially in the so-called Western countries. And the other countries think they also need to be like that.

To me taking care of myself is simplifying, downsizing. Living in harmony with all. Growing internally, being rich internally. Growing as a human being, caring, compassionate, loving. Not harming others, animals, nature, the planet herself. That is what taking care of myself is about. Less stress, more time, more awareness, more living in the present. No attachments, no expectations. Just being.

My connection to humans has always been a fragile one, as I do have a love-hate thing going on with humans in general. And someone I talked to sensed that. She said that I don’t show my true self fully. And that is true. My trust in humans has been damaged so many times that I am always on guard somewhat. I almost never give myself 100%. There is always a part of me, probably my deepest core, that will not reveal itself. And in the claiming my lane part that is an “issue”.

But with working on my self-love and acceptance, I also slowly opened to my fellow humans more and more. Still not revealing the deepest parts of myself, but getting there. Step by step. And being gentle on myself along the way.

And I have seen beautiful examples of humanity. Especially when shutting out the every day (bad) news, I have been getting a more positive outlook on humanity. My faith being restored step by step. My love for humans started growing. I saw beautiful projects, individuals making a difference, collaborations to live more in harmony with all.

My hope grew over time. Yes, it is changing. And with that, I fell for the good-bad again. I started judging people who were still on that “old” energy. Including those around me.

So, what can I do about it? I can take them on journeys to become better persons. Make them aware of their true nature. Connect them to nature. I can do this. I can “change” them. I can “make” this happen.

And then, in one moment, I was thrown back in time. With one image that was shared on Facebook by National Geographic. The pain and horror of that image. I felt the pain and the fear of the animals in the picture. And with that one picture, my faith and hope in humanity was shattered. So angry, so sad. I cried so hard. How can people do this! Selfish little bastards. I hope that something will come to wipe away these stupid overbreeding parasites. I hope that nature will turn on humans and destroy them once and for all. We don’t even deserve to survive. Heartless, stupid, mutant monkeys. That was what was going through my mind.

At that point, I thought, that’s it. I am giving up. I will disconnect from everything and live my life out as a hermit, taking care of animals and plants. I don’t want to connect with humans ever again.

I had a terrible night, couldn’t really sleep, had nightmares.

In the morning, still crying every time the image came back to me, I was ready to just shut everything down, also disappear from the online world. I truly was done with it. But, in one of my groups, someone shared something about pulling through, even if everything seems to be against you. She called it Sisu, it is a Finnish thing. Wow. Ok.

So, I stopped, took a moment, wiped my tears and asked the Universe and the animals why they had shown me this picture. They said they had to show me this, to remember my deepest why. To go on and keep going. But to remember my path. That I was wandering of it again. Listening to others about “how I should” do things. They told me to start listening to that inner voice even more. And share from my heart and intuition. No planning, or overthinking. Just speak what comes to me. I was chosen by the animals and nature to speak for them. To be their channel, their bridge. And I should not wander off to doing something else.

To keep on going with my original plan, to reconnect people with nature. To connect to the other channels and bridges, that are pure and without hidden agendas. To create something bigger on this together.

So, here I am. Still crying over that image. Sending love and healing to the animals involved. And being neutral to the humans that were involved in this. I am not ready to show compassion, I need some more time on this, but at least I am no longer on the destroying humanity path.

And this? This is who I am. This is what I care about. This is claiming my lane.

Diana

Nature Guide?

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The last few days I have been feeling angry. Angry with myself, for not stepping into what I really love doing sooner. Angry with myself for always feeling so damn responsible for everything and everyone. Angry with myself for letting myself put my dreams on hold to take care of others. Angry with myself for having stepped into the being dependant on others trap. Angry with myself for making “wrong” choices when it comes to education and business. Angry with myself for expecting others to love and understand me, whilst I never was open and honest to myself. Angry with still believing my mother will start giving a “damn”.

As you can see, a lot of my anger is directed towards myself, for not being true to who I really am. For loosing myself along the way. I have been doing a lot of self-love and care on this, and forgiveness work.

I’ve tried to be angry with others, but that is not fair. I’ve never spoken up to them, always kept quiet to keep the peace. Because I don’t like conflict. I don’t like to be judged or blamed.
I’ve tried to be angry with humanity in general, and to a certain point I am, but I also know that to create any change in the world I want to see, I have to start with myself.

But still…. !Warning: start of a rant!

I don’t get humanity. Honestly, I don’t. I don’t get how we work. I often think we are a flawed step in evolution, because what species would ever destroy their own habitat? Or be so judgmental toward each other for reasons I will never get?

A species that follows books, written many centuries ago, by people that thought they had it all figured out back then. A species that has created a society that is so totally not logical to me.

Lately I have been seeing how we have created this big illusion for ourselves. We think we are free, but we are slaves to the system, slaves to money. We really are. And the situation I am in right now, is only reminding me of that.

Something on the news triggered this rant. About a certain group of people protesting to get more pay. I started thinking on this.

We have created a weird cycle, called economy. We all are being fed the bigger-better-more lies, and this is where it starts.

More pay, to buy more stuff we don’t need, food and drinks that are not even healthy for us, so we get sick and have to pay for healthcare, that again isn’t healthy for us, so we end up paying for even more healthcare. We of course need big cars to move all the stuff and food we don’t need, and even bigger houses to store all of that. We all need our “own space” with our own tv and everything. We need more pay to buy the newest of the newest, while the old is still perfectly fine. We have to buy the big tv to watch the 8 o’clock bad news, and horrible series and movies with death and destruction, or about unrealistic love relationships. But wait, luckily companies like Coca Cola and MacDonald’s come in between to tell you that to be happy you have to buy their food and drinks. Or that you will be the most attractive woman with that perfume. And the most wanted man with that deodorant. And of course, you have to get the latest fashion, even if your closet is already overloaded. And the newest line of beauty products, filled with chemicals and that mess up your hormone system. Oh wait, those chemicals are also in our foods, so why bother. Oh, and all of it is obviously wrapped in plastic, individually, that will end up in our food chain again. Darn, we still aren’t happy. Well, let’s do a few holidays a year. To tropical destinations, to end up at a resort where you will never see the actual country and culture. Darn, still not happy. Let’s buy more stuff. Oh, we need more pay for that. We will just work harder. Oh, wait, now we have stress. Now we have to do all kinds of stuff to relax. Go to a spa, visit entertainment parks, zoos, get massages, go on meditation courses, learn yoga and mindfulness. And guess what? We still aren’t happy! Something must be wrong with us. Maybe we have some sort of childhood trauma. Maybe we can drown ourselves in addictions, alcohol, drugs, medicine, tv, social media, sex, gambling. And back to health care it is, this time mental health care. Therapists, sleeping pills and anti-depressives. Self-help books and false guru’s that sell the latest trends to get more spiritual. Guess what? Still not happy. Let’s get a dog. Or more. Or a cat. No, wait, a horse! Oh, maybe a pig. And a parrot. And a few bunnies. Mmmm, still not working. Maybe kids are the answer. Let’s have some of them. Darn, it isn’t working. I wonder why. Oh, let’s get some help on that. Yeah, it worked! I am happy now! But, wait, how can I make enough money now? Oh, we will just hire a nanny, get them to do all kinds of afterschool activities. Wow, kids are expensive, they are so demanding, they want all of this stuff, I don’t know where they get this from, they are so ungrateful! Can’t they just leave me alone? And they are so disconnected! It’s like they don’t hear me. There must be something wrong with them. Let’s get them a label, so we can put some meds in them. And my partner is so unsupportive and having an affair! Divorce time! Let’s hire a lawyer. Wow, they are expensive….. need to work harder to pay for that. Auch, what is that pain on my chest….. why are they calling 911?

Wow….. when all of this was going through my mind, I kept seeing Charlie Chaplin in that scene from Modern Times where he is working the machine and gets completely swallowed by it. This film is from 1936! And we have been only living life faster ever since. We don’t even have time to think for ourselves anymore! And that’s exactly what the big people who are in charge of everything want.

But, still, people are waking up. Slowly. Like me. I have been stepping out of the system more and more since a few years, trying to find a more natural rhythm, and my way of doing things.

And the more I step out, the more aware and awake I become. How we are being fed by the media, big companies and politicians all the time. To keep us busy. Because once you step out, you start thinking for yourself. And see the big lie we are living, and the false freedom we think we have.

This year especially, with writing my book, going inside, and realising so many things about my life, and life in general, my eyes have been opened. And I feel more awake than ever.

And with this I also realised what brings me the most joy of all. And that is just being. Being with other pure humans, through loving connections. Being in nature, with nature, with the animals. Slowing down, really slowing down. Listening to slow music. Taking my time to wake up, do my morning rituals, and find what brings me joy. Realising that what we really need isn’t in the material stuff. It is in the connections, it is in the heart, it is found in love.

With the selling of the house and getting a divorce, the craziness of these systems even hits me more. We are basically selling stuff that never belonged to us in the first place. Land? Who are we to claim this is ours? Nobody owns the land but the planet herself. But still, we buy and sell it as it was ours alone. Houses? Made of material given to us by Mother Earth? Fuel? We are draining the fossil fuels, and even going to war over them. But they were never ours to sell in the first place! Just think about it. Who are we to do all of this? And what do we give our oh so generous Mother in return? Nothing but waste, pollution, extinction of some of her children. And we are literally draining and suffocating her. And we keep fighting her ways of trying to control our population.

I believe that if we all become aware of the craziness we have created for ourselves and get real, she can sustain all of us, even some more. But we will HAVE to change to do so.

I believe that if you reconnect to nature, you will find back your true nature, and will find what really makes you happy. And that isn’t in material form. Because we have forgotten we too are part of nature. We are animals, we are mammals. Our brains just work in ways we don’t even understand ourselves.

The planet, the animals, nature, they have been giving me messages all year. That it is time to simplify, on every level. That it is time to slow down. Time to do honest labour again, on the land. We were not meant to sit all day; our bodies were not built for that, our minds need it to release and relax. The importance of community came up, and I am not the only one who has been receiving these messages.

Community in the form of living real-life communities, not just online, working together from a place of mutual respect and love for the planet. Not like the old hippie-free love communities, but with like-minded souls that also realise things need to change. Working together with the land, the seasons, the tides. Respecting the planet and all living creatures. Not using more than we need, and share the natural abundance.

To let go of this system that has made us greedy, hungry for things that we don’t need, that are not healthy for us.

I often wonder what I can do in all of this, besides making some drastic changes myself. I have been thinking about this a lot. Also for my business. Just today I saw a video about an eco-village, and one person said: if you stop working that 9-5 job you hate to buy stuff you don’t need, and start living a more natural life, than there will be no more life on and off the work floor. These things will fade away. There will just be life. My heart skipped a beat when I heard that. Yes…. That’s it. Just life.
I see so many suffering all around me, physically, mentally, emotionally. And I believe the society we have created ourselves is at the root of all of this. But pure connections, from the heart, living with the Earth and the animals, all in harmony? I feel lots of suffering will fade away if we start making changes like that.

I’ve been struggling myself with all of this in my business, in my money mindset. So many people I am connected with right now, are all about more, bigger, better. The word heart-centred had me fooled, as most of them are still caught in the prison of the old system that is not sustainable in the long run. All the marketing, all the selfishness. Only ready to do something if there’s something in it for them. I run into resistance on that part every time. And yes, I too am selfish, because I feel the need to protect that what gives me the most joy in life: Nature. I have been falling into the money trap myself, and yes, it is energy, it is exchange, but why more than I need? I can’t take it with me when I die? And I’ve been believing the limiting beliefs they told me I had around money. Maybe I have them, but what if my mindset is on a different level than theirs?

I have even been cancelling my contributions to charities, as I feel they just don’t work. They were just a way to ease my conscious. But did they make a difference? If anything, most of the things they stand for have gotten worse over the years. So, what is the use? And corporate has also been infecting the bigger charities, where CEO’s, advertising, marketing and more use up most of the funds. If you are lucky, 10 cents of your donated euro or dollar will reach the actual cause. Craziness. This system has proven it doesn’t work. More and more animals go extinct, poverty is still big, and diseases are more present than ever, climate change is moving faster under our influence. And all they do is pump money in working on healing the wounds, putting on band aids, but not enough is funded to see what the root of it all is.

I am seriously thinking of going for something like an eco-village, as of all the things I have looked at so far, this resonates the most with me. Or a tiny house. And although I would love to travel some, it also is in conflict with my need to live a more sustainable life. I don’t need to travel, that is for sure. And maybe, if I live in a place I really love, that really resonates with me, the need for travel will fade anyway.

I am not expecting for all of this to change overnight, but I am making small steps towards all of this. Time to truly walk my talk.

And if you are reading this and it is triggering something in you? Maybe it is time for you to start making the changes too. Step out of the system. Find what truly makes your heart and soul sing. And my job is done. I have guided you back to (your true) nature.

Diana

Freedom?

2

A while ago, a fly was trapped inside the house. I opened the window and set it free. Go, fly to freedom, I said to the fly. As I watched it fly off, until I could no longer spot it, I got this feeling. It just came over me. Freedom. And how I long for this.

I am reading an amazing book, A Path with Heart, by Jack Kornfield. In this book, he talks about naming your demons, the things that keep us from feeling at ease with ourselves and in life. One of the demons is doubt. He divides these in small and big doubts. The small doubts are the things you say to yourself, like I am not worth it, I am not enough. Things like that. You can work on them, and fairly easily shift them.

The big doubts however are signs that you are waking up to a new level of awareness. I am having one of those big doubts at this time, although I believe I had them earlier in life too. But the big doubt I am having right now is on the concept of freedom.

I read a post somewhere, and the question was asked what you would do if you knew you only had a short while to live. Most of the people responded: spend time with loved ones. And yes, that is important for sure, and although I would want to make sure my pets would have a great home, the first thing that entered my mind was travel.

I have been dreaming about traveling the world since I was a kid. Books got me traveling to a certain extent, and so did watching tv. But it wasn’t until I went abroad for the first time, to London with school, I noticed how much I love traveling. Seeing the world, other cultures, history, future. Nature everywhere.

And although I have travelled somewhat over the years, my biggest travel dreams still haven’t come true.

I am a deep thinker, a philosopher if you will, and went on thinking about this freedom aspect in my life. In our lives. How free are we really? Watching that fly take off. Watching the birds in the sky. Free to go wherever they want.

We can’t do that. We are being smothered by rules and regulations, borders and countries, limitations we have put onto ourselves as species. We let fear hold us back from truly being free. Fear of other cultures and religion, fear of terrorism, fear of spreading diseases, fear of …. everything?

Right now, I am in the process of selling the house and getting a divorce. Not because we hate each other, not because there is any form of abuse, not because we are cheating on each other. None of that. But, we have grown apart.

It isn’t even easy to get a divorce. And start a new life. Again, the rules and regulations.

So, again. What is freedom? Aren’t we all prisoners? Of the society we created ourselves?

Slaves to the economy? Slaves to money?

A society that is addicted to bigger, better, more, expansion and growth? And what is that bringing us?

I can’t grasp the concept of money anymore. Some say it is just energy. And it is mostly digital. If an EM pulse or Solar Flare from outer space wipes out our systems…. Where would the money go? Gone… And what then? Will an apocalypse start? Or will this be like the universe testing us on if we truly will support and help each other. Share. Like it happens after a natural disaster.

Freedom. Compared to other parts of the world, I can experience relative freedom.

But… freedom of religion? I think religion is causing the opposite. Living by rules from a book that someone probably mistranslated and then got misinterpreted by the readers? Why else would there be so many religions? Why don’t the animals ever talk about God to me? Or Allah? Or anything in that area actually. Why do we need to learn about religion? Does it mean it just isn’t there? Don’t get me wrong, I consider religion and faith as two different things. Animals have faith. In life. In the planet. In themselves.

Freedom of speech? Yeah, not really. I wonder how many of us actually truly say what they want to say, me included. Again, the fear comes on. Fear of hurting others, fear of being judged, or even worse, fear of being imprisoned or murdered for spreading your words.

And then there are all the boxes and labels. All created so we are able to create products or services to sell.

Next issue: when I start thinking about the things we sell, especially land, animals, foods. They were never ours to sell in the first place. They don’t belong to us. They were given to us by nature. But we are a greedy species. We want more. We even shout it at the end of a concert. We want more. Always more.

And then there is the media, the circus. It tells us all kinds of stuff, but how much of that is truth. Is it their truth? Who are they? Saying the world is a dangerous place, people are dangerous. The world is a place of suffering and pain. Oh, wait, time for a commercial break. Drink Coca Cola, it will make you happy. And the brains are washed again.

You don’t need Coca Cola, but you think you do. And so, we get trapped into the system of needs and wants. John Lennon sang it: Imagine no possessions, I wonder if you can…. Can you? When you honestly look at what you need? That isn’t that much. But we get tricked into thinking that the things we want are also the things that we need. And we let ourselves be tricked.

Mother Earth gives us everything for free, expecting nothing in return. But what do we give her? Exploitation, overpopulation, pollution, torture, suffocating. And she shakes, and spits fire, and tries to blow us away. Again and again, we stand up, we survive. We are so stubborn, hard to get rid of. Like cockroaches. By the way, I like cockroaches, they are amazing creatures.

The lives we live are an illusion. We think we need big houses. Yes, to store all the stuff we think we need. To create our “own” space. I looked at the shopping carts of people yesterday, and thought, wow… how many of that do they really need. Not much actually.

And what we actually do need? Connection, touch, love. Be honest, when do you feel happiest and most alive? For me that is in nature, being with animals, or spending time with like-minded souls, talking about life, and hugging, kissing and just sharing the love. From the heart. Free from judgment and expectations. When you feel bad, that you can reach out to someone. When you experience loss, knowing someone is out there to give you a shoulder to cry on. Just being there for each other.

I have heard a lot of spiritual people and people in tune with the bigger energies going on say that community will become more and more important in the future. I agree. But that can only happen if we let go of the system as it is today. When we truly will be able to share from a place of love. And not exploit the other.

But, we keep the system alive. A system that doesn’t work. That doesn’t make you happy or satisfied. Always leaving you empty and wanting more. Everything always from the outside.

Everything online, in the media, will make you feel empty and worthless. Because you don’t count if you are not successful, earning loads of money, are famous, or have invented something that changes the world. If you are not striving for more, bigger, better. If you don’t want to enter the rat race or are not competitive. The expansion never seems to end.

And still we will feel empty. With all our stuff, and big houses, and big cars, and big bank accounts.

Growth to me is something quite different. To me it is inner growth. Developing my inner wisdom. My need for no needs. Success to me is something different. If this blog touches just one soul to start thinking about the illusion we have created for ourselves, then this is a success.

I know, this is big, deep stuff. Too deep for most. I don’t care. This is what is going on for me, and I need to write it down and spread it.

Just stop for a moment and think. Look around. What have we created? All of us together? Are you happy? Fulfilled? Loving your life? Or are you forever searching outside to fulfil those needs.

Do you really care if there will be a planet in the future that is healthy? Where we can still live? Or our children can still live? Do you really care about animals going extinct (yes, that is forever, no return)? Living in the now doesn’t mean you should only think about your own needs, and not see what your actions might cause in the long run.

The animals have been giving me the message to simplify. And I will. I will start living by the rules of nature, of what she asks of me. I will not fall into the bigger, better, more trap. I will downsize. Get rid of most of my stuff. Back to basics. And yes, some things I cannot change, they are too big. Like the existence of countries and borders. Like the fact that it costs money to get a divorce. That it costs money to live somewhere and buy food. But… I can try to make the first steps towards change.

They say freedom is a state of mind. I disagree. When I look at our society, I don’t think freedom is a state of mind. We are all prisoners and slaves to a system we keep alive ourselves. And the ones with the power, they keep feeding us. Bread and games. Just like the Romans did. Keeping the sheople in line. And we keep falling for it. We keep giving away our power.

I think back to that moment with that fly. Yes, it may not live a long life, but at least it is a free life. Yes, it ends up with death, and must face all kinds of danger. But it does so out of free will. We also end up meeting our death one day, and face all kinds of dangers. But even those we are fighting against.

I don’t know. Maybe I’ve got it all wrong. I just look at nature, the animals. They are free. The only price they have to pay is at our hand.

So, I will start making changes. I have to start somewhere. Society and our economy as it is now, is no longer sustainable, something needs to change. And maybe it’s these big doubts that will set in motion a chain of events that will change the world.

I may be a dreamer, but I also know I am not the only one. Maybe it is time to start realising those dreams.

Namaste.

Diana

Happenings and celebrations

2

I can’t believe it’s been a month since I reached out, or published anything! Time really does fly.

But this time in a very joyful way. Filled with things I love to do. Writing, planning things to become more visible, meeting people in real life, giving in-person workshops. I feel like I have had all kinds of mini-breakthroughs since my last blog. And most importantly, fell back in love with myself and life. I had been missing that in my life.

I just wanted to give you an update on what is happening/coming:

  • Coming Saturday I will do my first healing/meditation session with the Vibrant Sensitive Healing Circle that I run with Karin Monster-Peters. In this first month, we are working on healing our bodies, I will guide you on a healing journey together with Mother Earth, our great Nurturer. You can join at any time, read more on THIS page.
  • I am writing a series of blogs, the Art of Letting Go, inspired by my own journey since the beginning of 2017, where indeed I had to let go of so much, and detach on several levels. But this gave me so much peace, clarity, and above all space for being and expressing myself fully.
  • Next Tuesday, September 26th, I am doing Speedreadings for Charity again, if you want a spot, I have only two left. You can read more on THIS page. I am doing these until the end of 2017, and after that I am no longer giving individual animal talk consults. My path is guiding me in a different direction.
  • Registration for the next round of my membership group Down to Earth Spirituality is coming up, this month we went on a deep heart-healing journey with Rose Quartz, in October Comfrey will be joining us. For the first time a plant, interesting to see what it will bring us. Read more on THIS page.
  • Next week I am a Member in the Spotlight on Project Positive Change. Every day, except Sunday, I will be doing a live stream on their Facebook page, and will share meme’s and blogs and other inspirational posts on there. Maybe you can support me 🙂 You can find the Facebook page over HERE. I am proud to be a member of PPC.
  • I am currently creating a course on Nature Communication. I am getting the details refined, and as soon as I have this clear I will share the page with you, but I will share some more on this in my Member in the Spotlight.
  • I have completed the first part of my upcoming book Around My World With 80 Spirit Animals for editing. As I am now focusing more on my writing I trust I will get the complete manuscript done somewhere in the first quarter of 2018. I have created a separate Facebook page for my writing journey.
  • October 17th, I will be a guest on the Positive Vibes show, together with Karin Monster-Peters from the Vibrant Sensitive and Sam Livermore, the Gladiator of Love and the founder of the Share the Loveletters movement. Our host is Pete Cossaboon, the Angel Encourager. I will share this event as soon as I have more details. It will be on Pete’s Facebook page, and it is at 4 pm CET.
  • The weekend of October 21st I will be attending the Healing Path Workshop in the Lake District, with Daniel Mapel and the Wild Earth Animal Essences. I am very much looking forward to this journey and workshop.
  • I have an interview planned with the beautiful Sashka Hanna-Rappl for her Podcast. You can join her podcast over here. I don’t know when it will be aired, but I will let you know.
  • November 12th, I will be giving an in-person workshop introduction Animal Communication. This is by invitation, and the one organising it will promote the workshop. This is in the Netherlands and will be in Dutch. I want to do more of these in the future, so if you are interested, contact me and we can see if we can arrange something.

And much more is in the making.

Most importantly I feel so much flow and joy now in what I am creating. And all because of getting clear on my why and purpose. I have been struggling for many years on what to do, how to do it, how to show up, but once I stepped back, went inside, it became clear.

You see, the things I have been doing so far didn’t feel quite right. I mean, I love connecting, especially to animals, but I felt like I still was putting on band aids. Or making people dependant on my services. And what I want to do most of all is to inspire people to do it all themselves. I don’t want to solve your problems, I don’t want to close your gaps, or point out your pain points. I most of all want you to go inside and find the answers for yourself. I may guide a bit on this, with the help of nature and the animals, but above all I would love for you to become aware of your own uniqueness.

And this is how I feel you will also realise more and more how we are all connected, and that everything you do in life impacts the other in one way or another, including the planet and the animals. Once you start connecting to your true nature, get rid of all the outer layers and start loving yourself again, in all your glory, then you will also stop the need for bigger, better, more “stuff” to fill the holes of your soul, and that will benefit everyone.

My goal has never been to be rich or successful in numbers, I only ever wanted to inspire and make you aware of your own story.

So, this means stepping back from one-on-one work, into group work, writing, teaching and inspiring.

You see, it is not about me, it is not to feed my ego, it is about this bigger plan that we are all a part of. The higher calling of all of humanity, of the planet, the animals, all are involved, we are evolving together.

I will share much more the coming weeks, but if you feel that the path I am now on is not for you feel free to unsubscribe, unlike, or unfollow me. It is ok to no longer resonate with what I do and offer.

If, however you want to be inspired, please keep in touch, and connect to me if you have any questions. Or just want to say hi 🙂

For now, I hope you have a great day, no matter what time it is when you read this. And please share/pass this on to people you think might be interested.

Much love and light to you all,

Diana

After the eclipse

6

Wow, what an intense period this is. The energies… the eclipses, the fires in the heavens, the Blue Storm wavespell.

I feel broken and beaten, I have been through so much lately, and that ended in me having a physical scare last Saturday. It made me realise I have been fooling around again. Not being totally honest with myself and others. Not aligned with what I truly want and what my purpose is in life.

I had a few days where I felt so much fear, panic, anxiety. Old, really old wounds opened up again. Fears I thought I had gone through over the past few years. Fear of failure, fear of dying young, not being enough, not doing enough, not fulfilling my purpose.

I think it was coming, the signs were there. I stopped playing the harp, stopped singing and dancing, not wanting to connect to people, including my husband, not enjoying life. I was comparing myself to others big time.

I was stuck in a place of survival. In many areas. I wasn’t thriving. I was laughing it all away, not wanting to go there and admit I wasn’t doing as ok as I let myself and others believe.

I went for the oh, others have it much worse than me, trap again. As I have done many times in my life. Writing my book really lets me see that pattern.

So, this morning, in the aftermath of the eclipse, I knew it was time to make some tough decisions. To stop and change some things. In life and business. And I know that in doing this I am giving myself space to create something that is even better in alignment with my souls’ purpose.

It felt like failure though. But, as with everything in life, it is ok to change my mind, to break down certain things and start building something new. Like the Spider that builds up her web again after the storm destroyed it.

I know I have to. The health scare and almost having no money at this time are clear signs to me it is time to make some big changes. I know if I don’t the Universe will do it for me in not so gentle ways.

It is all about finding my joy, my ease and effortlessness, my passion and flow. So, this morning I sat down and went through what brought me those. I had a reading last week with someone, who could sense that my Solar Plexus was low in energy, but that my basic colour was yellow-orange. The colour of joy and light.

This is not the first time somebody has shared this with me, or seen this with me. They all see this fire, this light, but it is dimmed.

She also sensed my connection to the animal kingdom, and the fact that I divide animals and humans. Weird, right? I preach we are all the same, but honestly? I place animals above humans many times. So, there is a lesson in there for me.

One of my biggest lessons in life is to love myself, be gentle to myself, and above all, follow my inner wisdom. I have been caught up most of my life in the should and must do things. Every time I wanted to make a big decision on something, other people would talk me out of it. I wanted to be liked and approved by others so much, that in the end I most of all ended up pleasing everyone but myself.

So…. back to the drawing board again. What do I really love to do, where do I feel alive and passion:

  • Animals. Learn about animals, nature, plants, trees. All of it. I am like a sponge. I love it. And I love sharing about it.
  • Music. Music can move my heart and soul, in ways the spoken word never could. I mean, would a movie be just as good without the music? Or a nature documentary for that matter?
  • Writing! Oh yes. Writing. And the fact that I don’t get to it as much as I would like is stressing me out.
  • Talk about the deeper meanings of life, on what’s going on with the energies. Deep, profound talks. I am a bit of a philosopher.
  • Walk. I love to walk. Especially in nature. Climbing a hill (not mountains because of my poor stamina haha).
  • Just be. Sit (or walk) and listen. Be in stillness.
  • Be a channel: the things I create for my membership group, the meditations, my writing. These are truly guided. I never know what will come, I just let it come. And it is truly effortless, I don’t have to think about it.
  • Spend time with wonderful people, but the right ones. Finding my tribe. But also honour my need for self-time, and be okay with that. No more excuses. Just saying I need some alone time.
  • Watching sunrises and sunsets in faraway countries, spending time on a train. I love to travel and learn about new people, countries, cultures. And I really miss that.

I feel I have been creating a lot of things for others, because I had learned that I must do something, offer something of value. But. Am I not enough? The things I just wrote down. That should be enough. And it is. More than.

Now, what does this mean for my work? My business? My life?

We are in the midst of selling our house, and we are not sure on where to go next. I don’t even know where to put my relationship with my husband right now. I am still exploring what this means. So, committing to a new house and mortgage is a bit overwhelming. But I know I really want more nature, and more quiet, so maybe temporarily move into a recreational home for instance. We will see, and I am not alone in this. This needs more exploring and clarity.

In my business, well, this needs some big reviewing indeed. I have been doubting continuing the animal communication sessions for pets for a while now, but every time people were like, oh, no, don’t stop, you are so good at it! So, I continued. But, no more, I feel I need to use this gift in another way. So, yes, this might come as a shock to some of you, but I will discontinue the animal communication sessions with pets.

This will also mean I will stop doing the Speedreadings for Charity. I will find another way to support my favourite charity in this. I will do them the rest of the year, but stop them in 2018.

You see, I no longer want to do it for you. I want to do it with you, empower you to learn yourself. I don’t want to give you the answers, I want you to find them yourself.

This will be much more powerful and improve the bond with your animal and nature big time.

So, this is something I will start creating, but I will let this grow organically. Effortless 🙂 With joy and ease.

I will continue being the messenger for animals and nature, always, but do that through writing blogs and books, and through my membership group Down to Earth Spirituality. I really want to do more with that and explore the options in there.

I will start recording the meditations I already have gotten through and combine those with nature sounds and music I will make myself.

I am going to explore giving workshops in real life, maybe together with others. The options of creating nature- and medicine walks. And maybe organising retreats together with other beautiful souls.

In September I will be starting the Vibrant Healing Circle with Karin Monster-Peters and this will be a good way for me to learn to co-create.

So, that is where I stand right now. This is what I am going to explore the coming months.

As always, with love and light,

Diana

 

 

 

Speedreadings for Charity and Rose Quartz in the Down to Earth Group

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Hello everybody!

Two short announcements for you:

First: Next Tuesday I will be doing short readings with pets for charity again. I have 7 spots left. Read more about it on this page and claim your spot.

Second: We are just about to enter the closing week with Bumblebee in the Down to Earth Spirituality Group, and already looking forward to working with a very different kind of energy, that of a crystal: Rose Quartz. Read more about that on this page and register for September.

Looking forward to being of service again!

Love and light,

Diana